baconator

i was cooking the other morning--six strips of bacon, to be exact--and while i was cooking, i didn't notice anything wrong all about me...i was happy, at 8AM making breakfast for my boyfriend...when all of a sudden he comes out and says that he thinks my bacon's done. and i'm just standing there thinking, how do you know? you didn't even come look at it!

.......they were ready.......a little too ready, and i didn't realize it until my apartment's fire alarm told me so. while that damn alarm was ringing me deaf, i was hoping on my life that this alarm didn't set off the rest of the alarms in the building. could you imagine?! everyone outside on the campus lawn because i was making six strips of bacon?! i would have dug myself a hole out there and buried myself in it.

so what could i do? i scrambled downstairs to the lobby to tell the security guards but before i could step an inch from the elevator, i saw a police officer heading my way and for some reason, a ridiculous grin came across my face and he looks at me and says:

"406, right?"

i wanted to say no, but of course i admitted it. i tried to explain myself, but he smiled and said that even shower smoke can set off the alarms because they were so sensitive. honestly, that did make me feel much better about myself. at least i didn't walk out of the shower and have the alarm go off on me. that's worse than bacon, i think.

so what did i learn from cooking bacon at school?

never to cook bacon on high.

or maybe never cook bacon at all.

i'll george-foreman them.